My paper heart

Dear Future Husband,
If you're out there please feel free to let me know at anytime.
Waiting almost patiently,
Your Wife.


Ladies, ladies, ladies...it's time for a little chat:) Do you ever feel like the entire world is in love, leaving you with barely enough breathing room with all the couples moving about so freely? Do you go to weddings and plan out your futire wedding, even when you went to the wedding completely single? Do you feel like the phrases "good guy" or "real love" are from another planet? I know I have many times...and don't think I'm a loser for the wedding thing, I know you do it too! I'm here to pose a solution to the constant wear and tear of these "paper" hearts: cut it up and throw it in the dumpster. Nope we aren't going to be eco-friendly with this one...throw it away. Now you may be thinking..."Well Tiffanie what do I do without a heart? I mean I need to have that to be able to love.." You're exactly right! The second part of the solution is to ask Jesus for a new one. And I am talking the full on blood pumping, pulsing heart we need to survive. You see, society will give us 101 reasons to snag the right guy, or 866 ways to look good in your jeans, but the one thing society will not tell you is how to gain true love...God's love. When you get a new heart from Jesus you will feel in different ways, see in different ways and walk in different ways. Your hair will become a a minute detail compared to your radiating inner beauty. Your heart will beat for something more than that boy who knows how to drop sweet words with empty meanings. You will shine in the darkest places and Jesus's love will be your satisfaction. You ask, "is this possible?" Yes. But it is hard.

I struggled for the longest time with asking God for a knew heart. I knew that God would give me a radically different one that bled in a totally new way. Jesus would take away the false sense of security that is so often found in relationships and He would replace that focus with Him. I knew this...and for the longest time the door remained shut. He knocked and knocked...quietly convincing me that He had a better plan in store and that temporary love would never compare to the beautiful love story He wanted to bless me with. I refused, I shouted, I cried...until, completely breathless and aching, I surrendered. I have never been the same. It's been nearly a year and I can still feel the fresh wounds of a will I thought was God's going awry. But I have never felt more blessed. You see, God has placed in us desires to be married and have companionship, but He will not compromise your heart in order to give it to you. For so long I wrote that letter I began with in my heart. I was not willing to wait for God to show me. And I suffered for that.

We have the most beautiful Author at work in our lives...gently writing and scripting our stories into play. So often we rip it up...or put it in the drawer for later reference. This must stop...now. God has a beautiful love story in mind for us! Whether that be marriage for you or not, let Him write it! I believe one day I will be able to look at my husband and marvel with him over detail that brought us together. I no longer have my paper heart...I have the heart of Christ. Let me tell you...it's much more durable. :) So grab the scissors and get on your knees! Jesus is waiting.... :)

Dear Future Husband,
I look forward to one day receiving the second most beautiful kind of love from God to share with you. Our love will be an example of the love He so graciously gives us. I'm happy I no longer have a paper heart.
Waiting patiently,
Your Wife.